I’ve been feeling twitchy lately. I’m ready to move, to jump, to do something. A friend who became a widower before I did gave me two pieces of advice. The first was to just ride out all the ups and downs during that first year. I’ve followed that advice and boy, was he correct. Big, giant mood swings that race over my personal landscape like summer thunderstorms.
His second piece of advice was to break out of routine and do new things. I haven’t done that yet, in part because so much of my normal, routine life is no longer normal or routine. For a long time, still on many days, I’m stuck on figuring out how to manage the stuff I’ve always done.
Now I’m starting to feel just the tiniest little urge to do something, anything, that’s new and different. To lay down some memories that aren’t tied to what I’ve lost. To start down a new path, one I’ve chosen, freely, without consideration of what could have been, was, or should have been. There are ideas hatching. I’m starting to champ at the bit, ready to move forward.
The roller coaster ride continues, and will for some time. But I need to try a different ride, even if it’s just a quick one. Stay tuned…