It’s time. I spent the last year working through grief. It was a year of mostly downs, with some ups. The roller coaster of briefly feeling good followed by the longer slide down into despair. Playing detective in a futile attempt to make sense of what happened, as though this had been a mystery that just needed a neat explanation. Mostly just trying to hang on and make it through the tumult of emotions that came and went like Midwest weather patterns.
It’s time. I gave myself a year to process what had happened and come to grips with my new life. The year is up. Oh, I’m still in mourning; I’m guessing that, to some degree, it will continue throughout my life and end up a part of me; but I am not going to make the slide into professional widow.
It’s time. I’m still a widow and will always be one, regardless of where my life goes or what happens. I want that to be a badge of courage and inspiration and proof that terrible and sad events do not have to destroy. I made it through this first year.
It’s time. The people I feel I’ve “met” through this blog, the comments from other writers, the posts I look forward to reading; all have helped. I’ve learned I’m not alone, that many, many others have been through similar experiences.
It’s time. My goal for year 1 was to just make it through. It’s time for a new goal. This first year was focused on basic survival; now it’s time to live. Part of my moving forward is a new blog name. I’m still a widow, but I want to identify as other than sad, not just as a widow but as a person with a full life and a questing spirit and a desire to continue living.
It’s time. To change the name of this blog; and I’m asking for your help in coming up with a new name, one that I can move forward with as I move forward with my life.